The local sheriff was looking for a deputy, so Homer – who was not exactly the sharpest nail in the bucket – went in to try out for the job.
"Okay," the sheriff drawled, "Homer, what is 1 and 1?"
"11," he replied.
The sheriff thought to himself, "That"s not what I meant, but he"s right."
"What two days of the week start with the letter "T"?"
"Today and tomorrow."
He was again surprised that Homer supplied a correct answer that he had never thought of himself.
"Now Homer, listen carefully: Who killed Abraham Lincoln?"
Homer looked a little surprised himself, then thought really hard for a minute and finally admitted, "I don"t know."
"Well, why don"t you go home and work on that one for a while?"
So, Homer wandered over to the pool hall where his pals were waiting to hear the results of the interview. Homer was exultant.
"It went great! First day on the job and I"m already working on a murder case!"
—n. - comparative darkness (and usu. Coolness) given by shelter from direct light and heat.
- area so sheltered.
- darker part of a picture etc.
- colour, esp. As darker or lighter than one similar.
- comparative obscurity.
- slight amount (a shade better).
- lampshade.
- screen against the light.
- (in pl.) Esp. Us colloq. Sunglasses. 10 literary ghost. 11 (in pl.; foll. By of) reminder of, suggesting (esp. Something undesirable) (shades of hitler!). —v. (-ding) 1 screen from light.
- cover, moderate, or exclude the light of.
- darken, esp. With parallel lines to show shadow etc.
- (often foll. By away, off, into) pass or change gradually. [old english]
SHADY
adj. (-ier, -iest) 1 giving shade.
- situated in shade.
- disreputable; of doubtful honesty. shadily adv. Shadiness n.
SHAFT
n. - narrow usu. Vertical space, for access to a mine, or (in a building) for a lift, ventilation, etc.
- (foll. By of) a ray (of light). B bolt (of lightning).
- stem or handle of a tool etc.
- long narrow part supporting, connecting, or driving thicker part(s) etc.
- a archaic arrow, spear. B its long slender stem.
- hurtful or provocative remark (shafts of wit).
- each of the pair of poles between which a horse is harnessed to a vehicle.
- central stem of a feather.
- column, esp. Between the base and capital. [old english]
SHAKE
—v. (-king; past shook; past part. Shaken) 1 move forcefully or quickly up and down or to and fro.
- (cause to) tremble or vibrate.
- agitate, shock, or upset the composure of.
- weaken or impair in courage, effectiveness, etc.
- (of a voice, note, etc.) Tremble; trill.
- gesture with (one's fist, a stick, etc.).
- colloq. Shake hands (they shook on the deal). —n. - shaking or being shaken.
- jerk or shock.
- (in pl.; prec. By the) colloq. Fit of trembling.
- mus. Trill.
- = *milk shake. no great shakes colloq. Mediocre, poor. Shake down 1 settle or cause to fall by shaking.
- settle down; become established. Shake hands (often foll. By with) clasp hands as a greeting, farewell, in congratulation, as confirmation of a deal, etc. Shake one's head turn one's head from side to side in refusal, denial, disapproval, or concern. Shake off get rid of or evade (a person or thing). Shake out 1 empty by shaking.
- open (a sail, flag, etc.) By shaking. Shake up 1 mix by shaking.
- restore to shape by shaking.
SHAKO
n. (pl. -s) cylindrical plumed peaked military hat. [hungarian csákó]
SHAKY
adj. (-ier, -iest) 1 unsteady; trembling.
- unsound, infirm.
- unreliable. shakily adv. Shakiness n.
SHALE
n. Soft rock of consolidated mud or clay that splits easily. shaly adj. [german: related to *scale2]
SHALL
v.aux. (3rd sing. Present shall; archaic 2nd sing. Present shalt; past should) (foll. By infin. Without to, or absol.; present and past only in use) 1 (in the 1st person) expressing the future tense or (with shall stressed) emphatic intention (i shall return soon).
- (in the 2nd and 3rd persons) expressing a strong assertion, command, or duty (they shall go to the party; thou shalt not steal; they shall obey).
- (in 2nd-person questions) expressing an enquiry, esp. To avoid the form of a request (shall you go to france?). shall i? (or we) do you want me (or us) to? [old english]
SHALT
archaic 2nd person sing. Of *shall.
SHAME
—n. - distress or humiliation caused by consciousness of one's guilt, dishonour, or folly.
- capacity for feeling this.
- state of disgrace or discredit.
- a person or thing that brings disgrace etc. B thing that is wrong or regrettable. —v. (-ming) 1 bring shame on; make ashamed; put to shame.
- (foll. By into, out of) force by shame (shamed into confessing). for shame! Reproof to a shameless person. Put to shame humiliate by being greatly superior. [old english]
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