There was an Scotsman, an Englishman and Claudia Schiffer sitting together in a carriage in a train going through Wales. Suddenly the train went through a tunnel and as it was an old style train,there were no lights in the carriages and it went completely dark. Then there was this kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. When the train came out of the tunnel, Claudia Schiffer and the Scotsman were sitting as if nothing had happened and the Englishman had his hand against his face as he had been slapped.
The Englishman was thinking: ‘The Scottish fella must have kissed Claudia Schiffer and she missed him and slapped me instead.’ Claudia Schiffer was thinking: ‘The English fella must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Scotsman and got slapped for it.’ And the Scotsman was thinking: ‘This is great. The next time the train goes through a tunnel I’ll make that kissing noise and slap that English btard again.
- —n. - thing or force that unites or (usu. In pl.) Restrains.
- binding agreement.
- commerce certificate issued by a government or a company promising to repay borrowed money at a fixed rate of interest.
- adhesiveness.
- law deed binding a person to make payment to another.
- chem. Linkage between atoms in a molecule. —v. - hold or tie together.
- connect or reinforce with a bond.
- place (goods) in bond.
BONE
china n. Fine china made of clay mixed with bone ash.
- of contention n. Source of dispute.
- —n. - any piece of hard tissue making up the skeleton in vertebrates.
- (in pl.) A skeleton, esp. As remains. B body.
- material of bones or similar material, e.g. Ivory.
- thing made of bone.
- (in pl.) Essentials (the bones of an agreement).
- strip of stiffening in a corset etc. —v. (-ning) 1 remove the bones from.
- stiffen with bone etc. bone up (often foll. By on) colloq. Study intensively. Have a bone to pick (usu. Foll. By with) have cause for dispute (with a person). Make no bones about 1 be frank about.
- not hesitate or scruple. boneless adj. [old english]
BONK
—v. - bang, bump.
- coarse slang have sexual intercourse (with). —n. Instance of bonking (bonk on the head). [imitative]
BONY
adj. (-ier, -iest) 1 thin with prominent bones.
- having many bones.
- of or like bone. boniness n.
BOOB
colloq. —n. - silly mistake.
- foolish person. —v. Make a silly mistake. [shortening of *booby]
- n. Slang woman's breast. [origin uncertain]
BOOK
club n. Society in which selected books are available cheaply.
- token n. Voucher exchangeable for books.
- —n. - a written or printed work with pages bound along one side. B work intended for publication.
- bound blank sheets for notes, records, etc.
- bound set of tickets, stamps, matches, etc.
- (in pl.) Set of records or accounts.
- main division of a large literary work.
- telephone directory.
- colloq. Magazine.
- libretto, script, etc.
- record of bets. —v. - a (also absol.) Reserve (a seat etc.) In advance. B engage (an entertainer etc.).
- a take the personal details of (an offender or rule-breaker). B enter in a book or list. book in register at a hotel etc. Book up 1 buy tickets in advance.
- (as booked up) with all places reserved. Bring to book call to account. Go by the book proceed by the rules. In a person's good (or bad) books in (or out of) favour with a person. [old english]
BOOM
—n. Deep resonant sound. —v. Make or speak with a boom. [imitative]
- —n. Period of economic prosperity or activity. —v. Be suddenly prosperous. [perhaps from *boom1]
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