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Funny jokes

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police Officer see"s a car puttering along at 22 MPH.
He thinks to himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!" So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over. Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies, two in the front seat and three in the back, wide eyed and white as ghosts. The driver, obviously confused, says to him, "Officer, I don"t understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the problem?"
"Ma"am," the officer replies, "You weren"t speeding, but you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers."
"Slower than the speed limit? No sir, I was doing the speed limit exactly twenty-two miles an hour!" the old woman says a bit proudly.
The State Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle, explains to her that "22" was the route number, not the speed limit.
A bit embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer for pointing out her error.
"But before I let you go, Ma"am, I have to ask... Is everyone in this car OK? These women seem awfully shaken and they haven"t muttered a single peep this whole time," the officer asks.
"Oh, they"ll be all right in a minute officer. We just got off Route 142."

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Cryptic crossword №5: NUPTIAL

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ACROSS:
1. A female heir apparent to a throne
8. Diaphragm consisting of thin overlapping plates that can be adjusted to change the diameter of a central opening
9. Large Arctic and subarctic grouse with feathered feet and usually white winter plumage
10. Mixture of untoasted dry cereals and fruits
11. Inability to control the flow of urine and involuntary urination
12. Act as a stimulant
14. A traditional story accepted as history; serves to explain the world view of a people
15. Dislike intensely; feel antipathy or aversion towards
16. A tax collected by requiring a stamp to be purchased and attached (usually on documents or publications)
20. (trademark) a coffee flavoured liqueur
21. A permissible difference; allowing some freedom to move within limits
23. A conspicuous constellation in the northern hemisphere; between Great Bear and Orion at edge of Milky Way
24. The season around the 25th December (traditionally extending from Dec. 24 to Jan. 6)
25. An arrangement of events that attempts to achieve a maximum effect
DOWN:
1. Lacking in integrity
2. A shelter serving as a place of safety or sanctuary
3. Of or relating to a wedding
4. A person who is authorized to act as an agent for the sale of land
5. A dark grey cloud bearing rain
6. Capable of seeing to a great distance
7. The lean flesh of any of numerous American perch-like fishes of the family Centrarchidae
13. (zoology) having the body divided into successive metameres or segments, as in earthworms or lobsters
15. Exclamation of surprise, joy, dejection, uneasiness, weariness, etc.
17. An infective disease caused by sporozoan parasites that are transmitted through the bite of an infected Anopheles mosquito; marked by paroxysms of chills and fever
18. An item of property that is given in part payment for a new one
19. Mostly tropical songbird; the male is usually bright orange and black
22. The feeling of being bored by something tedious

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Random puzzles:
Crossword puzzle №6: WATERFALLS
Cryptic crossword №22: SURVEYING
American crossword №42: RUNNING MATE
Freeform crossword №9: PSYCHOLINGUISTICS
Crossword puzzle №7: SPORT
Cryptic crossword №23: ICE-SKATER
American crossword №43: GIVE-AND-TAKE
Freeform crossword №10: MERCHANT BANKS
Crossword puzzle №8: ANIMALS
Cryptic crossword №24: TIME SIGNATURE
American crossword №44: SPAGHETTI
Freeform crossword №11: SUMMER SAVORY



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< Administrator > 15.06.18
Cryptic crossword №5: NUPTIAL
Size of crossword: 15х15

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The largest cockroach on record is one measured at 3.81 inches in length.

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