A police officer pulls over this guy who had been weaving in and out of the lanes. He goes up to the guy"s window and says, "Sir, I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube."
The man says, "Sorry officer, I can"t do that. I am an asthmatic. If I do that I"ll have a really bad asthma attack."
"Okay, fine. I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample."
"I can"t do that either. I am a hemophiliac. If I do that, I"ll bleed to death."
"Well, then we need an urine sample."
"I"m sorry, officer, I can"t do that either. I am also a diabetic. If I do that I"ll get really low blood sugar."
"All right then I need you to come out here and walk this white line."
"I can"t do that, officer."
"Why not?"
"Because I"m too drunk to do that!"
v. (getting; past got; past part. Got or us gotten) (and in comb.) 1 come into possession of; receive or earn (get a job; got £200 a week; got first prize).
- fetch or procure (get my book for me; got a new car).
- go to reach or catch (a bus, train, etc.).
- prepare (a meal etc.).
- (cause to) reach some state or become (get rich; get married; get to be famous; got them ready; got him into trouble).
- obtain as a result of calculation.
- contract (a disease etc.).
- establish contact by telephone etc. With; receive (a broadcast signal).
- experience or suffer; have inflicted on one; receive as one's lot or penalty (got four years in prison). 10 a succeed in bringing, placing, etc. (get it round the corner; get it on to the agenda). B (cause to) succeed in coming or going (will get you there somehow; got absolutely nowhere; got home). 11 (prec. By have) a possess (have not got a penny). B (foll. By to + infin.) Be bound or obliged (have got to see you). 12 (foll. By to + infin.) Induce; prevail upon (got them to help me). 13 colloq. Understand (a person or an argument) (have you got that?; i get your point; do you get me?). 14 colloq. Harm, injure, kill, esp. In retaliation (i'll get you for that). 15 colloq. A annoy. B affect emotionally. C attract. 16 (foll. By to + infin.) Develop an inclination (am getting to like it). 17 (foll. By verbal noun) begin (get going). 18 establish (an idea etc.) In one's mind. 19 archaic beget. get about 1 travel extensively or fast; go from place to place.
- begin walking etc. (esp. After illness). Get across 1 communicate (an idea etc.).
- (of an idea etc.) Be communicated. Get ahead make progress (esp. In a career etc.). Get along (or on) (foll. By together, with) live harmoniously. Get around = get about. Get at 1 reach; get hold of.
- colloq. Imply.
- colloq. Nag, criticize. Get away 1 escape, start.
- (as int.) Colloq. Expressing disbelief or scepticism.
- (foll. By with) escape blame or punishment for. Get back at colloq. Retaliate against. Get by colloq. Manage, even if with difficulty. Get cracking see *crack. Get down 1 alight, descend (from a vehicle, ladder, etc.).
