The local sheriff was looking for a deputy, so Homer – who was not exactly the sharpest nail in the bucket – went in to try out for the job.
"Okay," the sheriff drawled, "Homer, what is 1 and 1?"
"11," he replied.
The sheriff thought to himself, "That"s not what I meant, but he"s right."
"What two days of the week start with the letter "T"?"
"Today and tomorrow."
He was again surprised that Homer supplied a correct answer that he had never thought of himself.
"Now Homer, listen carefully: Who killed Abraham Lincoln?"
Homer looked a little surprised himself, then thought really hard for a minute and finally admitted, "I don"t know."
"Well, why don"t you go home and work on that one for a while?"
So, Homer wandered over to the pool hall where his pals were waiting to hear the results of the interview. Homer was exultant.
"It went great! First day on the job and I"m already working on a murder case!"
- allegation, often malicious or in breach of confidence. [old english]
—v. - (often foll. By to, with) converse or communicate verbally.
- have the power of speech.
- (often foll. By about) a discuss; express; utter (talked cricket; talking nonsense). B (in imper.) Colloq. As an emphatic statement (talk about expense!).
- use (a language) in speech (talking spanish).
- (foll. By at) address pompously.
- (usu. Foll. By into, out of) bring into a specified condition etc. By talking (talked himself hoarse; did you talk them into it?).
- betray secrets.
- gossip (people will talk).
- have influence (money talks). —n. - conversation, talking.
- particular mode of speech (baby-talk).
- informal address or lecture.
- a rumour or gossip (talk of a merger). B its theme (the talk was all babies).
- empty promises; boasting.
- (often in pl.) Discussions or negotiations. now you're talking colloq. I like what you say, suggest, etc. Talk back reply defiantly. Talk down to speak condescendingly to. Talk a person down 1 silence by loudness or persistence.
- bring (a pilot or aircraft) to landing by radio. Talk of 1 discuss or mention.
- (often foll. By verbal noun) express some intention of (talked of moving to london). Talk out block (a bill in parliament) by prolonging discussion to the time of adjournment. Talk over discuss at length. Talk a person over (or round) gain agreement by talking. Talk shop talk about one's occupation etc. Talk to rebuke, scold. talker n. [from *tale or *tell]
order n. Unreasonable demand.
- ship n. Sailing-ship with a high mast.
- story n. Colloq. Extravagant story that is difficult to believe.
- —adj. - of more than average height.
- of a specified height (about six feet tall).
- higher than the surrounding objects (tall building). —adv. As if tall; proudly (sit tall). tallish adj. Tallness n. [old english, = swift]
—adj. - (of an animal) domesticated; not wild or shy.
- insipid; dull (tame entertainment).
- (of a person) amenable. —v. (-ming) 1 make tame; domesticate.
- subdue, curb. tameable adj. Tamely adv. Tameness n. Tamer n. (also in comb.). [old english]
v. Ram down hard or tightly. [tampion stopper for gun-muzzle, from french tampon]
n. - strong taste or smell.
- characteristic quality.
- projection on the blade of esp. A knife, by which it is held firm in the handle. [old norse tange point]
abbr. Hyperbolic tangent.
engine n. Steam engine with integral fuel and water containers.
- —n. - large container, usu. For liquid or gas.
- heavy armoured fighting vehicle moving on continuous tracks. —v. (usu. Foll. By up) fill the tank of (a vehicle etc.) With fuel. tankful n. (pl. -s). [originally indian, = pond, from gujarati]
deck n. Machine for using audiotape (separate from the amplifier, speakers, etc.).
- machine n. - machine for recording telegraph messages.
- = *tape recorder.
- recorder n. Apparatus for recording and replaying sounds on magnetic tape. tape-record v. Tape recording n.
- —n. - narrow strip of woven material for tying up, fastening, etc.
- this across the finishing line of a race.
- (in full adhesive tape) strip of adhesive plastic etc. For fastening, masking, insulating, etc.
- a = *magnetic tape. B reel or cassette containing this. C tape recording.
- = *tape-measure. —v. (-ping) 1 a fasten or join etc. With tape. B apply tape to.
- (foll. By off) seal or mark off with tape.
- record on magnetic tape.
- measure with tape. have (or get) a person or thing taped colloq. Understand (him, it, etc.) Fully. [old english]
n. - vetch, esp. As a cornfield weed or fodder.
- (in pl.) Bibl. An injurious cornfield weed (matt. 13:24-30). [origin unknown]
- n. - allowance made for the weight of packing or wrapping around goods.
- weight of a vehicle without fuel or load. [arabic tarha]