A police officer pulls over this guy who had been weaving in and out of the lanes. He goes up to the guy"s window and says, "Sir, I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube."
The man says, "Sorry officer, I can"t do that. I am an asthmatic. If I do that I"ll have a really bad asthma attack."
"Okay, fine. I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample."
"I can"t do that either. I am a hemophiliac. If I do that, I"ll bleed to death."
"Well, then we need an urine sample."
"I"m sorry, officer, I can"t do that either. I am also a diabetic. If I do that I"ll get really low blood sugar."
"All right then I need you to come out here and walk this white line."
"I can"t do that, officer."
"Why not?"
"Because I"m too drunk to do that!"
abbr. (also swapo) south west africa people's organization.
SWARD
n. Literary expanse of turf. [old english, = skin]
SWARF
n. Fine chips or filings of stone, metal, etc. [old norse]
SWARM
—n. - cluster of bees leaving the hive with the queen to establish a new colony.
- large cluster of insects, birds, or people.
- (in pl.; foll. By of) great numbers. —v. - move in or form a swarm.
- (foll. By with) (of a place) be overrun, crowded, or infested with. [old english]
- v. (foll. By up) climb (a rope or tree etc.) By clinging with the hands and knees etc. [origin unknown]
SWATH
n. (also swathe) (pl. -s) 1 ridge of cut grass or corn etc.
- space left clear by a mower etc.
- broad strip. [old english]
SWEAR
—v. (past swore; past part. Sworn) 1 a (often foll. By to + infin. Or that + clause) state or promise solemnly or on oath. B (cause to) take (an oath) (swore them to secrecy).
- colloq. Insist (swore he was fit).
- (often foll. By at) use profane or obscene language.
- (foll. By by) a appeal to as a witness in taking an oath (swear by almighty god). B colloq. Have great confidence in (swears by yoga).
- (foll. By to; usu. In neg.) Say certainly (could not swear to it). —n. Spell of swearing. swear blind colloq. Affirm emphatically. Swear in induct into office etc. With an oath. Swear off colloq. Promise to abstain from (drink etc.). [old english]
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