A police officer pulls over this guy who had been weaving in and out of the lanes. He goes up to the guy"s window and says, "Sir, I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube."
The man says, "Sorry officer, I can"t do that. I am an asthmatic. If I do that I"ll have a really bad asthma attack."
"Okay, fine. I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample."
"I can"t do that either. I am a hemophiliac. If I do that, I"ll bleed to death."
"Well, then we need an urine sample."
"I"m sorry, officer, I can"t do that either. I am also a diabetic. If I do that I"ll get really low blood sugar."
"All right then I need you to come out here and walk this white line."
"I can"t do that, officer."
"Because I"m too drunk to do that!"
—v. - suddenly move or spring back in fear, horror, or disgust.
- shrink mentally in this way.
- rebound after an impact.
- (foll. By on, upon) have an adverse reactive effect on (the originator).
- (of a gun) be driven backwards by its discharge. —n. Act or sensation of recoiling. [french reculer from latin culus buttocks]
v. (-ies, -ied) copy again.
—n. - a piece of evidence or information constituting an (esp. Official) account of something that has occurred, been said, etc. B document etc. Preserving this.
- state of being set down or preserved in writing etc.
- (in full gramophone record) disc carrying recorded sound in grooves on each surface, for reproduction by a record-player.
- official report of the proceedings and judgement in a court of justice.
- a facts known about a person's past. B list of a person's previous criminal convictions.
- (often attrib.) Best performance (esp. In sport) or most remarkable event of its kind on record.
- object serving as a memorial; portrait. —v. - set down in writing or some other permanent form for later reference.
- convert (sound, a broadcast, etc.) Into permanent form for later reproduction. for the record as an official statement etc. Go on record state one's opinion openly, so that it is recorded. Have a record have a recorded criminal conviction or convictions. Off the record unofficially, confidentially. On record officially recorded; publicly known. [latin cor cordis heart]
v. - recover or regain (a loss).
- compensate or reimburse for a loss. recoupment n. [french recouper cut back]
adj. Of or by means of the rectum.
n. - (in the church of england) incumbent of a parish where all tithes formerly passed to the incumbent (cf. *vicar).
- rc ch. Priest in charge of a church or religious institution.
- head of some universities and colleges. rectorship n. [latin rego rect- rule]
n. (pl. -s) final section of the large intestine, terminating at the anus. [latin, = straight]
n. Member of the military police.
v. - make or become red.
v. - recover by expenditure of effort or by a stipulated payment.
- make a single payment to cancel (a regular charge or obligation).
- convert (tokens or bonds etc.) Into goods or cash.
- deliver from sin and damnation.
- make up for; be a compensating factor in (has one redeeming feature).
- (foll. By from) save from (a defect).
- refl. Save (oneself) from blame.
- purchase the freedom of (a person).
- save (a person's life) by ransom. 10 save or rescue or reclaim. 11 fulfil (a promise). redeemable adj. [latin emo buy]