There was an Scotsman, an Englishman and Claudia Schiffer sitting together in a carriage in a train going through Wales. Suddenly the train went through a tunnel and as it was an old style train,there were no lights in the carriages and it went completely dark. Then there was this kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. When the train came out of the tunnel, Claudia Schiffer and the Scotsman were sitting as if nothing had happened and the Englishman had his hand against his face as he had been slapped.
The Englishman was thinking: ‘The Scottish fella must have kissed Claudia Schiffer and she missed him and slapped me instead.’ Claudia Schiffer was thinking: ‘The English fella must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Scotsman and got slapped for it.’ And the Scotsman was thinking: ‘This is great. The next time the train goes through a tunnel I’ll make that kissing noise and slap that English btard again.
n. American burrowing rodent, ground-squirrel, or burrowing tortoise. [origin uncertain]
GORGON
n. - (in greek mythology) each of three snake-haired sisters (esp. Medusa) with the power to turn anyone who looked at them to stone.
- frightening or repulsive woman. [greek gorgos terrible]
GOSLOW
n. Working slowly, as a form of industrial action.
GOSPEL
n. - teaching or revelation of christ.
- (gospel) a record of christ's life in the first four books of the new testament. B each of these books. C portion from one of them read at a service.
- (also gospel truth) thing regarded as absolutely true.
- (in full gospel music) black american religious singing. [old english: related to *good, *spell1 = news]
GOSSIP
column n. Section of a newspaper devoted to gossip about well-known people. gossip columnist n.
- —n. - a unconstrained talk or writing, esp. About persons or social incidents. B idle talk.
- person who indulges in gossip. —v. (-p-) talk or write gossip. gossipy adj. [old english, originally ‘godparent’, hence ‘familiar acquaintance’]
GOTHIC
—adj. - of the goths.
- in the style of architecture prevalent in w. Europe in the 12th–16th c., characterized by pointed arches.
- (of a novel etc.) In a style popular in the 18th–19th c., with supernatural or horrifying events.
- barbarous, uncouth. —n. - gothic language.
- gothic architecture. [latin: related to *goth]
GOTTEN
us past part. Of *get.
GOVERN
v. - rule or control with authority; conduct the policy and affairs of.
- influence or determine (a person or course of action).
- be a standard or principle for.
- check or control (esp. Passions).
- gram. (esp. Of a verb or preposition) have (a noun or pronoun or its case) depending on it. [greek kubernao steer]
GRAMME
var. Of *gram.
GRANGE
n. Country house with farm-buildings. [latin granica: related to *grain]
