As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife"s voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there"s a car going the wrong way on 280. Please be careful!"
"Heck," said Herman, "It"s not just one car. It"s hundreds of them!"
Crossword puzzle help
List of words beginning with:
abbr. Justice of the peace.
—v. (-bb-) 1 a poke roughly. B stab.
- (foll. By into) thrust (a thing) hard or abruptly. —n. - abrupt blow, thrust, or stab. - colloq. Hypodermic injection. [var. Of job = prod] JAG
—n. Sharp projection of rock etc. —v. (-gg-) 1 cut or tear unevenly.
- make indentations in. [imitative] - n. Slang 1 drinking bout. - period of indulgence in an activity, emotion, etc. [originally dial., = load] JAM
—v. (-mm-) 1 a (usu. Foll. By into, together, etc.) Squeeze, cram, or wedge into a space. B become wedged.
- cause (machinery etc.) To become wedged or (of machinery etc.) Become wedged and unworkable. - a block (a passage, road, etc.) By crowding etc. B (foll. By in) obstruct the exit of (was jammed in). - (usu. Foll. By on) apply (brakes etc.) Forcefully or abruptly. - make (a radio transmission) unintelligible by interference. - colloq. (in jazz etc.) Improvise with other musicians. —n. - squeeze, crush. - crowded mass (traffic jam). - colloq. Predicament. - stoppage (of a machine etc.) Due to jamming. - (in full jam session) colloq. (in jazz etc.) Improvised ensemble playing. [imitative] - n. - conserve of boiled fruit and sugar. - colloq. Easy or pleasant thing (money for jam). jam tomorrow promise of future treats etc. That never materialize. [perhaps from *jam1] JAN
n. & adj. Colloq. Often offens. = *japanese. [abbreviation]
n. - a container, usu. Of glass and cylindrical. B contents of this.
- colloq. Glass of beer. [french from arabic] - —v. (-rr-) 1 (often foll. By on) (of sound, manner, etc.) Sound discordant, grate (on the nerves etc.). - a (often foll. By against, on) (cause to) strike (esp. Part of the body) with vibration or shock (jarred his neck). B vibrate with shock etc. - (often foll. By with) be at variance or in conflict. —n. - jarring sound or sensation. - physical shock or jolt. [imitative] - n. on the jar ajar. [obsolete char turn: see *ajar, *char2] JAW
—n. - a upper or lower bony structure in vertebrates containing the teeth. B corresponding parts of certain invertebrates.
- a (in pl.) The mouth with its bones and teeth. B narrow mouth of a valley, channel, etc. C gripping parts of a tool etc. D grip (jaws of death). - colloq. Tedious talk (hold your jaw). —v. Colloq. Speak, esp. At tedious length. [french] JAY
n. Noisy european bird of the crow family with vivid plumage. [latin gaius, gaia, perhaps from the name gaius: cf. Jackdaw, robin]
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Ants can lift 20 times their own body weight.